Random thoughts...

So I've been having lots of random thoughts that I wanted to share in this blog today. My life is continuing on in France. I'm having fun, making new friends, exploring lots, and getting tan! But that's not what I want to write about tonight...it doesn't seem as important or relevant as what I want to convey to you. Below I will write thoughts that I've had as God is teaching me new things, these apply to me, and maybe you as well. Feel free to leave thoughts, comments, or questions. P.S. don't be surprised when I turn these thoughts into a song.

Being stuck, being lukewarm, this is not what You want.
Being rebellious, being selfish in our actions are not what our callings are.
Walking the path of destruction which leads to Your denial of knowing us is not the path You've chosen for us.
You sent Your son so that we may know You.
You created us for Your purpose, we are not meant for this world.
You put us in this world with a reason, a purpose, a calling greater than we know.
You've given us the freedom to act as we choose.
You've given us guidelines, help, and consequences.
You tell us to walk the straight and narrow-to produce good fruits.
We want you to know us, know Your children, and hold them close.
Protect us from the temptations of the world, keep our hearts pure for You.
Your way leads to life, the narrow way brings us truth to our lives. The narrow path may appear hard, but we do not walk it alone. The battle may become tedious or redundant, but it is our calling to press on and not retreat.

We press into Your presence so we may enter Your kingdom. We raise our expectations of what Your power and Spirit can do and will do.

Seal our hearts with the knowledge of what we have.

The things we see, the things we hear, the things we encounter are not pleasing to You, so why do we do them? Why do we settle for what's of this earth and never think about eternity? If we knew more about eternity, maybe then we'd be a little more concerned about what people will be enduring. Why do we feel forced to settle and to be around earthly things/desires? Were we not given free will? We purposefully place ourselves into situations where we'll be tempted and then it just becomes easier and easier to give in to that instead of relying on the strength of our Lord. We are not material beings, friends! When will we start living in that way?

Halfway

Well...it was a pretty eventful week for me and I've not been very good at writing often, so this entry may get rather long, so I hope you'll stick it out!

I am officially halfway through my time in France, which is crazy! I have several days off until the next session starts which is nice. This week was filled with events, some of which were unexpected others were just sad or difficult... I talked to with Amy and we decided that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger...we're smart people. Let me see here...Monday was so long ago! It was just an ordinary day though. Katie and I got to hang out a bit in the afternoon getting to know each other more. It was nice. Tuesday I took my 2nd exam of the month. The afternoon was stressful for me however. Alex, Sandra and I went to buy train tickets to go to Italy, and struck out. There was no train tickets to get us to Florence, we could get to Milan and then MAYBE get to Florence. So we decided to go back Wednesday with a plan B. Tuesday night my host parents daughter and her family arrived...2 little screaming children in tow. It was fun seeing them and watching the little kids run around and play. That brings me to Wednesday. Wednesday was not a happy day...probably one of the worst I've had here. I got up and went to go meet Alex and Sandra at the train station to look into other tickets. They were supposed to meet me there after their class. I got there a little earlier to start looking. I wasn't finding much. By the time they got there I had to leave to rush to class, so I left ticket finding in their hands. I was running late, so I had to walk fast, and it was hot, so I got sweaty haha. Then I thought I'd try a new way which I thought might be shorter...I nearly got really lost...it was not shorter! So I arrived to school a little late, hot, sweaty, upset, and annoyed. Alex and Sandra told me later they bought tickets to Milan for Mon-Thurs. I told them we have class on Thursday so we can't do that, and it wasn't going to be worth going Monday, and coming back Wednesday, so they took the tickets back. Needless to say, I'm not going to Italy any time soon haha. It was a really disappointing and stressful day, I was pretty sad when we couldn't get tickets to anywhere in Italy, but I thought there must be a reason!

Thursday was a long day...I ended up having to take a proficiency test all morning, which was SOO hard!!! My head literally hurt after. It was lots of listening and reading French and answering questions. Then I had lunch and had to sit in class for 4 hours...blah! I got my presentation grade back and got a good grade so that was happy! Yesterday was another long day, and sad. I had morning class which was nice, we watched a movie and then had a little party. Katie and I did some shopping after class, then went back to school for a little "graduation" ceremony. We all got certificates! yay! then there was refreshments. Then it was sad to say bye to some of the people I've met here this month...including Katie. It was weird having these people leave, and yet I'm staying. It's almost like I'm starting all over again, which is good and bad. Once classes start back up again on Thursday, I know July will fly by and I'll be home before I know it.

Today, I went paddle boating which was fun, with some girls I've not really had the chance to hang out with...3 of them being Mormon. I enjoyed being able to be open about Christian things. I got sunburned pretty badly, which is a little sad, but oh well. The Japenese girl that has been living here leaves Tuesday I think, and then the new student comes that same day. It'll be crazy. I'm not sure what I'm going to do in the next few days, so we shall see I guess!

Summer is here!

Well...there has been a drastic change in the weather this week...it's been sooo hot!! I think it's been in the 90s the past couple days. I live in a house with no airconditioning, so it gets pretty muggy and gross! We ate dinner outside tonight which was nice.

I've been in Annecy now for 3 weeks, which is crazy to think...I feel like I"ve been here ages, but at the same time, it feels like I just got here. Tomorrow I start my last week of the first session. It'll be sad at the end of the week to say goodbye to some people, including Katie. I know my way around the downtown part of Annecy fairly well now, found some places that we love to eat at, and have been enjoying sitting by the lake. Yesterday was the music festival in the town. There were SOOOOOOOO many people!!! I told Sandra it was like the Woodstock of Annecy! What the music festival is, is there were several different bands stationed all over the town, at least like 7 different spots. And people just walk around and listen, or can sit at a restaurant and listen. There were just lots of people in general...a gridlock of people, mostly drunk people. Sandra, Katie, and I got Chinese food and tried to enjoy some of the festival...we found it hard to do being hot and tired and unable to move very far at any speed. We heard some REM remixes, some regage, some jazz, etc. It was a cool part of the culture to experience.

Thursday I gave a presentation in class...10 min in French. I gave a mini short version of my testimony and talked about a song that Les and I wrote (My little girl...) I translated it in French and showed the class the words. I told them what I like about the song etc. I was really nervous mostly because I was talking in French about Jesus. I was worried how the class would respond. They responded really really well. Conversation was sparked, and I was asked what I believe. It was pretty cool. Surprisingly, one of the guys I was most worried about actually went to the church where Lifeteen (a Catholic organization for youth that my church also does) started. Anyway...it was good, and I felt good after...it was kinda like me coming clean, ya know? I was happy after, needless to say. Oh, and they made me sing part of it in English...that was the most terrifying!!! Hopefully what I said planted some seeds somewhere along the way!

Friday, Alex, Sandra and I leave for Italy...Florence, for 3 days. We're pretty excited, just a little scared about not knowing any italian haha. It'll be good, I've always wanted to go to Italy, so hopefully it'll be a good trip.

This morning I attempted at going to the church that I found on my walk last Sunday. I thought there may have been a mass at 11, but I was wrong. I walked into the church and there were not a lot of people, I just sat in the back and observed. I had brought my Bible so I started reading while I waited to see what was going on. Needless to say, it didn't take long for me to realize that the priest was going to be baptizing several babies. I felt like everyone saw me and was wondering why I was there. I watched a little bit of the ceremony in between reading...it was hard for me to understand what was being said. A little old lady, on her way out of the church, saw me and stopped and asked me what I was reading, and so I showed her. She said that I was admirable for being there and reading. Then she asked if I was at mass and I told her no because I didn't know what time it was at. She then asked if I was French, and I said no, and she asked if I was American and I said yes. I told her I was studying there and staying with a family. Then she left. I didn't stay for the whole baptism...after a bit, I went to a park across the street and sat and enjoyed the view and read my Bible for a while before coming back home. It was a nice morning, but embarrassing!! haha

So yeah...it's hot here. I'm missing home of course, but am trying my best to live it up here while I can!! I have some more pictures to post, but that might have to wait until tomorrow or Tuesday, as it is my bedtime now!

Friday the 13th

So it's Friday the 13th...and also the halfway point for the month of June, which means I"m a quarter of the way through my time in France. I'm still missing home, but am in a routine and adapting to a life here. Today was an interesting day... I had an exam this morning which wasn't much different from my French tests back home so that was good...hopefully I will receive a good mark! After class, Katie and I were on a mission to find lunch! We'd never gone down the road our school was on in the opposite direction of which we came and I wanted to see what was down that way, if anything. So Katie agreed and we went walking...and walking...and walking...we saw some great scenery! The mountains and the lake were beautiful!! It was just a few miles later that we found civilization again haha. We had been seeing signs for restaurants and whatnot but for whatever reason nothing was open! Finally Katie saw a sign for McDonald's...we walked all that way to find something exoctic and exciting and we found a freaking McD's....what the heck?! Oh well...Katie was happy, it was a piece of home for her...But we had a nice long walk too so that was fun. We saw lots of bikers and rollerbladers while we walked...apparently biking here is like...idk...it's so serious!!! haha Then seeing all the rollerbladers made me miss my rollerblades...weird, I know...missing rollerblades...but it's true. Then after we got back, we went riding the bus to find out where it ended...not the type of place we thought it ended at!! That was funny....ah...

My host parents' grandson is here for the weekend I think, so he was at dinner tonight. He's 13 and seems pretty cool I guess. He speaks really fast so I couldn't understand much of what he said. Tomorrow I'm going to Geneva for the day! It seems like lots of people are going, including my friends, so hopefully the weather will hold out and it'll be a great day!

One of the things I knew God would be teaching me here long before I left was to be a stronger person...not the weak small little Emily everyone knows, but to be able to stand up for things etc. Today, I felt like I was able to see a little bit of that strength come out...On the walk I took with Katie, we walked past this lady at a bus stop who glared at me...I'm not sure if it was something "crazy" or not about it, but I could feel something start latching on to me as we walked past and instantly felt sad. I recognized what was going on and was able to stop myself from falling into that trap of sadness and depression. I was excited to realize that God was giving me chances to practice being strong.

Do swans attack??

Today was a pretty good day--it didn't rain!!! I had afternoon class today, and I've not been doing a whole lot before my afternoon classes. I like to sleep in if I can...yesterday I was rudely awakened by a man on the roof trying to fix my window! Today I was able to sleep in, and then I did my homework before heading into town for lunch. I met up with my friends and we went to our market to buy little lunch munchies. We decided to take it to the lake for a little bit and today we sat right on the edge and dangled our feet in the water...my first time "in" Lac D'Annecy...FREEZING!!! It was sooo cold! Shortly after we had started eating, we were joined by a rather large swan!!! He got right up by where we had had our feet, but we took them out...it was really scary! I thought we were going to be attacked, like in Gilmore Girls! haha I didn't realize how big some swans are...my goodness...I have a picture I'll have to upload soon. Anyway...we finally decided to vacate the area and head to class. It was class with Rosa again today...and I just love being in her class! I feel like I learn a lot and she really cares and wants for us to learn a lot. I have my first test tomorrow!! Scary...

As the weather begins to shift, I'm finding my mood shifting as well...I'm starting to feel more like doing things and seeing things, which is good, but not tonight! I have to go study!!!

Sunny Day #1

Today was the first real beautiful day in Annecy since I've been here. It was wonderful and a blessing to be able to be outside all afternoon. I had morning class today which went alright. It is sometimes rather discouraging and difficult when we do oral exercises like on cassette tapes...I just feel stupid sometimes haha because I'm not very good at them...never have been actually. I feel incompetent because I can't understand everything they say, it's just so fast. Anyway, I get easily discouraged after that, but hopefully it can only get better, right? Sandra decided today that she wants to speak more French with us since we usually speak English. So I was like yeah, let's try it, so hopefully it'll help us with our speaking and whatnot. After class the 4 of us went for a picnic by the lake. I got my first rays of sun! it was happy, I even got a little red. After we had finished eating, the three of them wanted to go check e-mail at the school but I wanted to stay in the park, so I stayed. I ended up falling asleep for a bit, but then I read my Bible. They came back to find me a couple hours later. We chatted some more before heading home.

Someone complained to me the other day that there's not been much about the battlefield in my blog, and I've guess I've been kinda neglecting that part, and the battlefield in my life. I told a friend that I felt like I had been retreating for so long I no longer knew the direction of the battlefield haha. I started spending a lot more time with our Jesus after that...the General as we now affectionately call Him. I've been noticing more areas where I could choose to fight...however, I've still been sitting back. A few examples...I'm around Alex a lot just because we know each other, but sometimes it gets really hard for me to be around him so much. Most of you don't know, but Alex is openly gay...he is also perverse, promisicuous, vulgar, etc. He knows my views on things, and sometimes, like the other day, he will stop because he doesn't want to upset me. It's just so tiring not having any strong Christian friends right now here with me. I often feel like he judges me because of my views. I know I'm dealing majorly with the fear of man here. I just need to keep praying boldness and courage into my life. Another example was yesterday on the bus before we left for Chamonix, there were people making bad jokes and talking about how the church has hurt them (I think more specifically the Catholic church, but I'm not sure...) and how they don't need God because they've done fine without Him. I wanted to say something, but I wanted to ignore it because I was getting angry and didn't want to speak out of anger. I ended up saying nothing...stupid fear of man. I'm hoping that God will show me the right time to minister to these people and prompt me to speak to them when that time comes...that He will light something in me that will burn and hurt until I speak! I'm believing Him for that and for boldness, I hope you will believe Him for that for me too!

Chamonix

Today I went to Chamonix, a cute little toursity town near the Alps. It was really cute and a great view! We got there about 10:30 and went to find food for lunch before our hike. Our guide took a small group of us on a little hike through the mountains. It was fun!! Luckily it wasn't raining and the sun was out. I got really warm though! C'est la vie! We had a great view of the glacier and Mount Blanc. I was a little sad I didn't go into the snow, but we're talking about going back so we can do that when it's not so cloudy. After the hike me and Alex and Cecila (from Sweeden), Natasha (from England), Katie (from Colorado) went into little shops and then we found a cafe and had some drinks and enjoyed the view. We had heard that McDonalds here sells wine so we wanted to check that out before we left since there was one there. When we got there, we learned they only serve beer! haha We thought it was really funny. We just hung out in town for a bit and then came home. It was a really long day, but it was good for me to keep busy so I wouldn't think about being homesick, etc. Plus I got to meet some new people which was fun! I'll try to upload some pics so you can get a glimpse of what I saw today! Enjoy!!

P.S. I've talked with my parents and they were basically like you're not coming home early, we'll pay for the housing so don't worry. So I will be staying until July.